It’s The Little Things That Count
I have been with my husband for over 19years, we were high school sweethearts. We have been through so much together. We have grown together, have been through many ups and downs. We have seen the best and the worse in each other yet I know without a doubt that he is the only man for me.
I know this deep within my bones, I know this as he is always in my thoughts every single day and I in his. He is my best friend and the one person I can always turn to for help and support. It’s the little things that keep us going, yet they can also be the things that we overlook & take for granted.
Why is it that we need big gestures of unrequited love to show that we love someone? Is it so we can show it to the world? Is it so we can prove to ourselves and to others that our partner loves us?
Personally, I think it’s the little things that keep me feeling loved, it’s when Nath sources things for me on gumtree when he makes me something with his hands when he helps me with my garden. When he tells me to go out and go for a horse ride. How he never hesitates when I ask if he minds if I go and do this and this. When he gives me a big cuddle & kiss every time he gets home and asks how my day is and still loves me if I am self-absorbed in the task at hand and forget to ask him. How he will automatically come and find us when he gets home to see what we are up to and if I need a hand. It’s when we go to bed and he will just cuddle me. When he listens to my bursts of inspiration or craziness and he doesn’t run the other way. These are the little things that remind me of how wonderful he is and how much I love him.
Yes, it is nice to get flowers, chocolates or a show of affection yet it is the little things that can remind you of what is really important and what you mean to each other.
Self-love is more than bubble baths & pedicures, it goes beyond the surface or the physical and goes to where your soul is, to where your essence is connected to this world through your heart.
Here are some ways you can grow your self-love:
- Talking your truth lovingly
- Expressing your emotions lovingly, even if it is uncomfortable or creates a reaction in someone else (someone’s reaction is not your responsibility)
- Giving your body the nurturing rest, exercise & comfort it needs
- Wearing clothes that make you feel good.
- Making choices that improve your quality of life,
- Using your intuition to listen to what foods make your body feel good
- Getting/better quality sleep.
- Creating experiences where you feel good doing something for yourself by yourself such as walking, meditating, yoga, dancing,
- Touch yourself with reverence and love
- Be your own best friend
- Become aware of your thoughts and start replacing a negative thought with a positive one
- Spending quality, connected & intentional time with yourself
- Choosing the environment that you surround yourself with
- Taking responsibility for your current issues
- Being empowered with one’s life, health, career….
- Follow your gut/intuition
- Allow yourself to dream big!!
- Don’t let yourself be limited to what others say you are.
- Letting yourself make mistakes
- Is not needing permission or approval from others to be yourself
- Loving and accepting yourself even when we think that we have failed
- Self-love is finding that side of the self which has been shut down and allowing it to roam free and shed light into our life.
- Bringing sacredness into your every day
- Have reverence for the woman you are and the life you have be given
- Honouring our needs & desires
- Feel your feelings
- Hold space for yourself to explore, expand & grow
- Be kind & compassion to yourself in all situations
- Listen to your soul’s whispers/intuition
Many in today’s society feel that self-love is egotistical & selfish. I am here to share that it is quite the opposite.
True Self-Love is Self-less, why?
Because when we choose to love all of who we are, our good and so called bad side, our strengths and our weaknesses we are then able to let go of judgements, we open up our head & heart & allow deeper more loving connections to develop in all areas of our lives.
So how do you do something that you don’t know what it really is? Below I have listed some of the ways that describe what self-love is.
21 ways self-love shows up in my life, which is:
- Honouring my needs, health & wellness & making it a priority.
- The ability to be able to give myself what I need freely without guilt or shame.
- An everyday thing that is found in my actions, reactions, thoughts, feelings rituals & habits.
- Found in every part of being a healthy, happy & joyful human.
- Treating myself like my own best friend, or the most beloved person in my life.
- Resting when I need to rest
- Saying yes to things that feel good to me and no to things that don’t serve me
- Creating clear balanced boundaries that sustain me
- Waking up with gratitude in my heart
- Allowing my joy to guide me through my day.
- Giving myself permission to be who I truly am in any situation, place, relationship etc.
- When I allow myself to speak up in what I believe in even if no one around me understands or supports me.
- Found in how I talk to myself, it’s where I let my thoughts take me,
- How I choose to react or act.
- How I find time for myself throughout my day,
- Making sure I am doing everything I can, to be the most I can be in mind, body & soul and let it be as joyful as possible knowing to my core that I am not a chore, my life is not a chore it is a blessing that I get to be who I am and live the life I do just like everyone else.
- Bringing sacredness into as much as my day as possible, life is sacred, I am sacred just as you are too.
- Being brave enough to listen to my intuition and not second guessing myself
- As simple as focusing on my breath when I am stressed or experiencing emotional turmoil and coming back to the present moment.
- As complex as working through my many layers/limiting beliefs/fears and being loving, kind & compassionate as I do.
- Different to everyone & the coolest thing is that you/me/we get to redefine it. No one wrong or right, it is perfectly perfect for each of us.
I truly believe that if I commit to cultivating self-love every single day, that I am able to show up more, give more & do more in a sustainable & high vibrational way because I have filled my cup up, I am confident, brave, courageous & most importantly, I feel loved because I love who I am and therefore I allow more love in from those around me. I seek more connected & authentic relationships & allow myself to be supported rather than doing everything alone.
By practicing self-love I have become much more open minded & hearted. I am less judgmental towards myself & others, I no longer let people mis-treat me as I know that I am worthy of being treated with respect & deserve love.
By choosing to cultivate self-love in my life, I choose to heal, I choose to let my heart feel & expand so that in turn I hold space to do the same creating a ripple effect throughout the world.
Self-Love is endless as am I, as are you.
Read the 29 some ways you can grow your self-love here.